Monday, July 27, 2015

Muse-ic Monday: Love Is Love

I recall the day I first heard this song. It wasn't on the radio, it was sent to me over Facebook from one of my best friends, my sister in Law. I broke down in tears and sobbed. I still cry evetytime I hear it. I can't help it.

The second time that I heard it was when a friend and I were helping my ex-husband move out. I burst into tears on the drive away from our home. My friend said he wanted to change it because he doesn't like rap. My ex, a notorious metal-head, quickly jumped to my defense and said it wasn't exactly rap or hip hop, but it was simply an important fucking song. I still love him so much for defending me in that momeent.

I love my ex, with my whole heart, he's still my best friend. It doesn't matter that we realized that we were better as just friends. What matters is that we realized we needed to change for our daughter and for each other, even if that meant being without each other in the romantic sense.

He's known for years that I've wanted to be with a female. Not that I didn't enjoy being with him, I absolutly did. It was just a little more complex than that. My family isn't exacltly accepting of...people like me, Goth/Freakiness aside. It's not something that they seem to tolerate that well.

Most of my closest friends know, and a few of my family members know, but I think they choose to try an deney it. Which is ok, that's their choice.

Anyway, I'm sort of just rambling, music makes me do that sometimes. I hear a song and pour my heart out over it. I can't help it.

In doing a little soul searching lastnight I came to realize that not only do I not want to be labeld in life (Goth, Punk, Hippy, etc...) I don't want to be labeled for my sexual preferences. More importantly, I don't want to be judged by them. If you want to date me then date me, don't worry about who I used to date or if I still like guys or girls.

That speaks more about your own insecurities if you're judging me based on the fact that I like people. Seriously, do you think it really matters if I still like guys (or girls) ? I could just as easily fall out of love with you and in love with a tree...

I mean, C'mon. It's like that saying "A mind that has expanded can never go back to it's old dimensions" I just can't and I don't want to. So, if people choose to judge me, or you, because you fall for hearts instead of parts then screw them.

So yes, this song hits me hard everytime. To me it's not just about liking the same sex, it's about the entire LGBT community as a whole. It doesn't matter who you love, as long as you love truly and with your whole heart.

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